Review quotes

"The world will never be the same after the city of Muttford betrays the bitter mainstream of human domination. There has never been such a captivating ride through any city, let alone any city so beautiful and marvellous and perfect." - WORDOLG GLOBE FOREIGN PRESS

"Seething beauty and peaceful vengeance: Spencer Ansley captures the contrasting sides to everything in this anecdote of a brilliant, blinding brightness. The city of Muttford is only created upon pages, but the true life, spirit and energy of the city has been captured permanently in my never-sleeping mind of dogs and freedom." - RHINOCEROS DAILY

Original Table of Contents


- Introductory Preface

     Part One: PRE

I - An Introduction to the City of Muttford
II - The History of Muttford
III - Wordolg and Professional Sports
IV - The Guards of Muttford


IV - Majerle
V - Europe
VI - Crowe
VII - The Master of Muttford

     Part Three: ONWARD

VIII - Ambulance
IX - Dark White Rays
X - New Animal Farm

     Part Four: AFTERMATH

XI - Pre

- Bibliography

Introductory Preface

     This book should be considered as if it were the first link in a continuing trilogy. This piece of work, its story presented within the format of a book (per se), had the very basic intentions of being submitted as a joint English and Art project, but has transpired to become more of an output of personal wrath, grief and exuberance.

     Firstly, the project requirements for the English course state that intelligent reference must be made to literary texts, thus the incorporation of minor excerpts from several known works has been blended into the story-line, usually whenever relevant. Five main works (three books and two films) provided the most outside influence for the story. They are: "Brave New World", by Aldous Huxley (1932), "Nineteen Eighty-Four", by George Orwell (1949), "Winter's Tale" by Mark Helprin, "A Shape of Things to Come", by H.G. Wells, and "Metropolis", by Fritz Lang; each similar in their plots concerning future, conditioned societies and all contributing to visual descriptions in the story. The instances that refer to these works are minimal, hold little importance to the structure of the story, and do not distract from the story itself, but are included mainly for the purpose of meeting the courses' requirements.

     Secondly, true, experienced events and individuals have been transported to cultivate a new, different society, creating its history and citizens, and set within the borders of an "ideal" city. This method serves not only as a personal release of anger and hate, but genuine aspirations as well. The endings to actual current circumstances have already been optimistically inserted, as if they were the desired and dreamed conclusions, which would be impossible to implement in this world, either because of the law, or bashfulness and low self-confidence. The majority of characters in the story are based upon individuals who exist and have been known, and, although originally unintentional, the inclusion of legitimate individuals, (using pseudonyms, of course), has filled the narratives with heart-felt emotion and a sense of realism. It should be strongly noted, however, that all catastrophic and fatal events have absolutely no chance of implementation, however much deserved, and that the happy and triumphant elements are merely aspirations, and will likely never occur.

     The most challenging element of creating this story on paper was the introduction of a narrative. The story alone would not have survived on a mere description of the city and the everyday routines of its citizens, thus chronicles of random characters were interjected to provide life, energy and a suitable, emotional climax. The climax of "Onward Muttford" is as disturbing, graphic and sickening as can be imagined, although it is derived from real and factual regular occurrences. The full effect of this is experienced to a more depressing, personal level thanks to the many preliminary chapters that set the foundation, and account for a quantitative amount of this writing. The descriptive segments are not intended to be lyrical and elaborate, but to give the reader a solid picture in one's mind for sake of familiarity with the city and itís running. There should be little need for personal imagination concerning imagery on the reader's part after the extended introduction is completed. Unfortunately, one can never judge how another will react to the same account as another individual does, and one can never be certain that they have presented their ideas as perfectly as they originally imagined; hopefully, this writing is at the standard initially intended whilst under creation - Truly, one can rarely monitor oneself sufficiently or adequately.

     The narrative is regularly interspersed with original lyrics and poetry, composed within the last few years. Most of which are excerpts from songs by the "National Bands" of the city, and a majority of the story was contrived by the content and message within some of the music. Full credits, for all works and outside reference included within the story, are listed in a bibliography provided at the back of the book.

     There are frequent points in the book where a paragraph may dip into italics, for several significant reasons. Firstly, italics may signify the Master's journey via the Skyport into another world created by an already established book. A second instance may mean that the words are of importance, and the reader's memory should allot additional memory to the focus on such lines. Lastly, more prevalent in the later chapters of the book, the italics represent an original, personal song, that has either been released, or will be released on an upcoming DHI album.

     The story and characters were not created and intended to be a joke: every piece of writing is to be taken completely seriously. Once the reader is able to move past the peculiarity of the citizens and their circumstances, it is then possible to accept this account as completely non-fictitious.

     If there is any point or moral to this story, it can and will only be achieved in the individual readers' minds. The principal element of this narrative, however, will strongly stand out.

     In conclusion, all ideas, conceptions and anecdotes should be perceived at face value, as these are merely strange yet intriguing citizens living in a wondrous city, and everything around this is created as to be authentic.

Additional notes in 2002

     Quite a few things have changed, particularly that the book was based on satirising my personal interests and real-life events. I am a completely different person now, but it is interesting to draw comparisons between then and now.

     I have not modified the content or the message of this novel, even if some points (such as "new alternative music") are embarrassingly out-of-date. The re-release of this novel is to capture my mental machine back in 1996, at 18 years old. The only changes I have made were to fix typographical or glaring grammatical errors; otherwise, this story is exactly the same as when it was written, in 1996. There is a footnotes feature for you to add your comments after any or all pages; you can also email any questions to me and I will answer them personally.

In retrospect, this novel was incredible for an eighteen-year-old, which I was at the time, but I know I could do a lot better now. Unfortunately, my second book, "Grimsby", was far superior, but it has been lost forever. Either way, "Onward Muttford" is an interesting, different read.

"Anarchy - Came over me

Victory - Within defeat

War is spurred - Death preferred

Deafening word - Onward Muttford"

The Muttford National Anthem

"Onward Muttford"

Master of Brightness shaped our land

Towers to bridges; Sculptures to sand

Raise our paws in unity

Donate our minds to help us free

Walls of thunder booming down

Stand in rain to hear its sound

Shot by hope to feel its glow

Watch the flag from liberty below

Death, Death: Pained misery

Split their skulls and we'll be free

Death, Death: Destroying our lives

Catastrophe looming in spite of our fight

Kill, Kill: Chilling the spine

Darker and darker approaching our time

Kill, Kill: Numbing the brain

End this game

Anarchy - Came over me

Victory - Within defeat

War is spurred - Death preferred

Deafening word - Onward Muttford

Introduction to the City of Muttford

     On a clear day, the tallest buildings that occupy the central island of Muttford are visible from anywhere in the city. From the airport, approximately fifty kilometres away from the causeway, the giant skyscrapers pop out into the air, almost eclipsing the sun. The magnificent skyline, regarded by many as the most breathtaking in all the world, is bordered by walls of blue ocean. A strong southerly wind (thus blowing to the left) carries the crisp, refreshing scent of cleanliness from downtown. There is no cleaner place on earth.

     The rhythmic waves beat upon the eastern seaboard, creating havoc among the always-unsatisfyable human tourists. A train of luxurious hotels separates the ocean from the mainland, via the golden sands of California's finest beach. Parallel to the major tourist area reveals the bulk of the foreign residences. A monstrous shopping complex serves as the centre of this area, the suburb named Eastern.

     Any position on the beach provides an unobstructed view of the central island. Also from here, the first dim outlines of the smaller outer islands become somewhat visible. The beach, when followed to its end, leads to a boardwalk that in turn terminates at the smaller causeway. This slenderer bridge supplies access to the central island from Eastern, the airport and the Skyport. Most other road travellers enter the island via the tunnel to the main causeway: several kilometres around.

     Various means of public transportation are available at very minuscule prices. The monorail network, nicknamed the "Mutt", stretches from the farthest Eastern border to the farthest edge of the Western suburb and serves the airport, North Muttford, the Prism island, and the entire central island. The ferry system, dubbed the "Dogfish", carries passengers from docks at Eastern, east-central island, Prism island, the concert park, the outer islands and North Muttford. Buses take passengers from every corner of the city to a transportation station. Financial note: it costs merely twenty-five cents for one ride by any means, and never exceeds two Muttford dollars for daily, unlimited travel. Because of this affordability, convenience and pure accessibility, public transportation is the choice of many, thus limiting damaging pollution and traffic congestion.

     The suburb of Western holds the majority of residences for local citizens, a population nearing one million. Not many foreigners reside in this part, as many feel intimidated, and human tourists are strongly advised to steer clear. The places of interest include the Muttford Major Shopping Complex, the stacked houses (internationally acclaimed structures), and the emergency services stations. Western also serves as the central link in the Skyway, Muttford's transportation superhighway.

     The mainland's "downtown" is directly on the opposite bank of the central island. The magnificent City Hall sits atop the bank beside the secondary causeway, providing a storied scene as one crosses the bridge. Beyond City Hall, farther from the island, lies the cross-section of downtown: the heart of entertainment and night-life in Muttford. Each street of nightclubs falls perpendicular to another full of eateries, the pattern following for six blocks. Each establishment is of the highest class, all providing first class service, delicious cuisine and catering to all levels of preferred tastes. The block set aside specifically for radio holds four of the six Muttford radio stations (the other two are in the MCS building on the central island). One broadcasts minority music (country, rap and pop music are the usual), another classical and jazz music, one more retrospective music ("oldies"), and the final, real alternative music. The latter is the major radio station in the city, though it mainly serves as propaganda for the National Bands...

     The beach beside North Muttford was the original landing site of the pirates, and earlier played host to the glorious battle between them and the Vikings. The memorial monument to the dead was constructed in the form of a stadium, where the Game was so successfully played over the only two years of its occupancy. North Muttford houses the wealthy citizens of the city, providing them solace and protection through a botanical wall of greenery. Only citizens who play or have played major productive roles in the city are granted residency in the upper class areas (actually located more north-west than west). Inhabitants include the Master and Premier (or so everybody assumes), the Mayor, the President, and every leader of their respective groups. "Heroes" also reside there. The University of Muttford is located on the Western side bordering the central island, and is ranked amongst Harvard, Yale and Oxford as the top institutions for education on Earth.

     The Prism island's sole purpose is to house the Muttford Civic Prism, the indoor sports coliseum, and its respective management offices. Professional ice hockey and basketball are played within these walls and its teams always perform exceptionally well. Other large spectacles, such as championship boxing, animal fights, and indoor concerts, are staged inside the Prism. The structure itself is unimaginable, and no verbal or written description can give it justice. Its walls are panes of blue, angled glass shaped into a geometrical wonder, with light dancing off each pane to illuminate the small island. The sparkling windows are also transparent, giving all inside the sight of the majestic backdrop of the skyline and the ocean. The offices that co-occupy the island have matching roofs to the Prism, giving the area an unforgettable, modernistic appearance.

     A ferry route from the Prism island sails directly to the two private outer islands of Junior and Labrador, the residence and work-place of the Master's mother. Much farther away, inaccessible by public transportation, lies the Isle of Punition, the Muttford equivalent combination of prison and death row.

     Finally, acting as the absolute core of Muttford, the central island provides another dimension to the city. The downtown business district, featuring the most prominent enterprises based on the island, circles the energy-producing Pyradome. The partially retractable roof of the stadium functions as a solar energy harness, accounting for more than seventy-five percent of the city's hydroelectric supply. This natural, free power further decreases the cost of living for citizens in Muttford. The remaining, smaller buildings branch out in several petite blocks, extending to the separations from the Sea of Muttford.

     The five most prominent skyscrapers on the island, which form a pentagon around the Pyradome, are the IBM Building, the MCS Towers, the NIN Building, the Worldwide Pants Building and the most intimidating of them all, the DHI Building. The other major enterprises located in the centre, but occupying slightly smaller structures, are the EJA building (the offices of the Master's father), the Majerle Centre, the Pyradome offices, the airline offices, and several prominent island hotels. A high source of interest and spending, facing the stadium's north-west side, is the Central Mall, provider of food and shopping for those on the island. First rate restaurants, expensive compared to the mainland's downtown but affordable nonetheless, are scattered around the island.

     The Wordolg Centre, home of every nation's comparable delegates, towers above the south-eastern shore beside the sea. The island's secret security headquarters is based in warehouses between the Centre and the concert park's wall. The masterminds of national security plot within its rooms, the emergency vehicles poised for defence. Invisible tanks roam the alleys of the private zone, with invisible eyes searching the shoreline for attackers. There is no safer place on Earth.

     The concert area, Dyers Park, is an altogether different and exhilarating site for major outdoor musical events. The stage is positioned in dramatic, purposeful effect for the audience, with the city's skyline forming a fabulous, breathtaking backdrop. The area itself is at the bottom-most point of the central island, where the land sharply narrows to a point (similar to the continent of South America). There is a gigantic, gloomy black wall behind the production district, forcefully separating the park from the remainder of the island. There is no possible way for the audience to reach the park by any means other than ferry or monorail, which automatically eliminates the possibility of impaired driving. Food, beverage and restrooms are available to the public, along with other, miscellaneous stalls, forming a market for the park. Yet another remarkable aspect of Muttford, in the view of the skyline, Dyers Park supplies one of the greatest sights in all of visual history.

     The Skyport, the only part of Muttford left not described, is extremely strange and unbelievable in concept. Citizens of Muttford have never launched inquiries regarding the Skyport; it is assumed that the price of its use would be too high and/or believe that it is only operated by the Master. The latter is absolutely correct: After constructing the city, the Master realised that a place of solitude and escape would be required, and thus the Skyport was assembled. Its black and blue walls rise into the air like a bruise; the estate is lined with thousands of unforrested trees and bushes, shaped into an uncoordinated mass of plentiful greens; every room is oddly bare, each varying in colour, portraying a steady sequence of moods; and the Master's tattered chair has no glamour or special function apart from its apparent comfort. The actual use of this facility is known only by the Master, and it is aimed to remain that way.

The History of Muttford

     The chronicle of the foundation of Muttford is rather obscure, and historians remain sceptical that all events were charted completely and accurately. The significant circumstances, though, seem to have historical conformity, thereupon the chronology of the history of Muttford is henceforth presentable.

     In late August of 1776, a mammoth patch of undeveloped and uninhabited land, approximately an hour east of what is now Los Angeles, was first populated by a pack of unsettled coyotes. Upon arrival, the coyotes began to create areas for living, eating, drinking and playing, as well as citing restrictions on regions for excreting and hunting. Although they had started their task of self-sufficiency, the group had little food in the meantime, so they had to seek temporary alternatives. In September, one coyote returned from her daily hunt with two new-born baby bears, and the pack devoured them. Upon discovery of who was responsible for the kidnappings of the infants (and death, they soon learned), a military platoon of bears was employed to destroy the coyotes for the simple intention to kill every coyote present. After the initial scuffle, the coyotes paired and retaliated, but though they clearly outnumbered the platoon, they struggled against the sheer power and determination of the angry bears. Immediately, an army of wolves and foxes appeared in aide of the coyotes.

     Within days, not one bear involved remained: they had either evacuated or had been bludgeoned and eaten.

     Unfortunately, the state of a peaceful civilisation was unattainable, because the unrest following the battle did not subside. Each of the three canine groups claimed the right to occupancy of the land. By January of 1777, the entire population of foxes each fought the entire population of coyotes, resulting in the substantial fleeing from the land by the foxes, of those who were still alive. Simultaneously, whilst the other two species warred, the abstaining wolves constructed dens and unearthed limitless supplies of provisions. The coyotes, immensely perturbed at the wolves, yet too fatigued to forcibly protest, conceded the territory in agreement that the two species would be able to co-exist peacefully and share in each other's findings. On December 13th, 1777, this pact of unrestricted liberty was signed as the "Treaty of Freedom", and thus the city of Wolverton was founded.

     The few discontent animals in the area, consisting of a broad range of species, unhappy with the prospect of sharing their personal habitats and utilities, migrated north up the coast together; ironically and contradictory, they would be living similarly as-one there. They stumbled three hundred and eighty miles up the pacific coast, before stopping at a second deserted patch of land, several miles west of what is now San Francisco. More unrest followed, however, as all species of canines continued their refusal to get along.

     On the seventh of February 1779, came the mysterious landing by hoards of Seadogs who arrived on ships, upon which they declared the entire site under their pirate rule. Diplomatically, they did state their absolute intentions for peace and calm, and had righteous intentions for pacificatory life under their regime; all parties agreed to this, avoiding the risk of further fatal violence.

     For almost a quarter of a century, the land was ruled by the Seadogs without many major problems or revolt. Peace, unfortunately, came to an abrupt end during the dawn of October 2nd 1813, when a fleet of Viking ships landed on the shore, and then immediately commenced assault upon the surprised inhabitants. The unprepared Seadog pirates amazingly managed to retaliate effectively, and endured the initial Viking barrage. Forming a viscous coalition, the foxes, coyotes, wolves and Seadogs, first resisted a second bombardment by the Vikings, then continued to annihilate the entire enemy fleet, presenting the species of the canine with their first triumphant victory over mankind.

     The news of this victory gradually spread around the world over the following century, prompting each canine generation to live increasingly more unbothered by the human species. Each breed of canine eventually reproduced with each other, creating a population of half-breeds and mutts. By the mid-twentieth century, few pure-bred species remained; strangely, there were even mixtures of dogs and cats, dogs and horses, probably dogs and almost every mammal.

     The second and most major battle between animal and man occurred in the winter of 1976, almost exactly two hundred years to the day that the wolves first populated the city of Wolverton. Growing populations of humans around North America, especially those in San Francisco, were frustrated and annoyed that dogs, considered to be merely household pets, occupied and ruled their own area of land. On January 29th 1977, a relatively small army of ten thousand troops marched into the canine-controlled district, ruthlessly demanded that the animals relinquish all jurisdiction of the area, and punctuated their mission by executing hundreds of defenceless dogs via gunshot.

     Enraged, dogs and animals from everywhere arrived at the site, and, in batteries of eight or nine, united to attack each murderous human. Within days, the initial convoy of humans had decreased by half, (though too did the dogs lose many lives), and ordered military assistance. A fully-armed army of fifty thousand humans arrived upon the land on March 8th 1977. Meanwhile, the canines' dilemma had communicated internationally, and a counter-force of five hundred thousand animals gathered in defence of the original dogs. Animals arrived mainly from Wolverton, though large contingents were present from Canada, England, New Zealand, Australia, and Germany. Whilst the gathered canines fought in unity for the second recorded time, they devised a creed that is repeated regularly in the life of dogs everyday:

The Canine Creed
As we bask in canine unity,

Our differences aware

All resentments aside,

With true pride inside,

We battled against man and bear.

Aside our dissimilar colours,

Nationalities and species contrasting

No prejudice existing entirely

This canine unity stands foreverlasting.

     Though the humans had superior strength and armaments, the sheer cunning and determination on the side of the dogs proved too extensively dominating and invincible, and resulted in the fleeing of most human soldiers by May of 1977.

     This unprecedented and historic war exemplified the unity and power of animals, their determination resulting in their right to liberty upon their uncontested land. On June 23rd 1977, the Master was born, whereupon the blueprints for a perfect city, inhabited and governed by dogs, was set forth, and hence the development of an ideal city had officially commenced. The city was christened Muttford, after a slain human soldier in the war, named Reich, had observed in his memoirs: "This city, or so seemingly a city, is infested with nothing but mutts. I've seen few animals here who appear pure, in fact, I do believe this population is mixed with everything. This is a city of mutts, disgusting tenacious mutts... I shall always remember this awful place as Muttford, the city of dogs."

     The creation of skyscrapers, buildings, hotels, houses, restaurants, malls, stadiums, parks, an airport, schools, and other developed structures were envisioned by the Master, who laid the foundation of his ideals, and recruited troops of builders to commence the construction of the city. The Master, fortunate enough to have lived and travelled throughout the entire world, was able to select the highest standards, values, and visuals that he had encountered in his journeys, to reproduce within his own creation. From 1977-78, he learned of London, his birthplace, and introduced to his city the concept of proper speech and intellectuality; home of Shakespeare, the Beatles, and gave the prominence of a long and storied history. His brief stay in Beirut taught him that all war, violence and unjustified death were unacceptable, so he placed an emphasis on securing his citizens from the possibilities of invasions and access to weaponry. His greatest influence throughout the creation of Muttford was his fifteen years in Singapore, a country very similar to the principles of his. Singapore had set an international standard of cleanliness and safety, an ever-onward progress of modern development, all enclosed in a multi-national environment, and was an independent city-nation, similar to the ideal organisation of Muttford. In full effect, a well-established legal system effectively balanced the strict (but just) penalties for conviction, adding to Singapore's positive influence transferred to Muttford by the Master.

     His vacations took him on various journeys internationally, his creativity linked by a worldwide web of personal experiences and observations. The city of Tampa Bay, Florida, with its amalgamation of lush greenery, golden beaches, bustling businesses and local courtesy, presented the Master with the idea of an ocean-side city, compatible yet unobtrusive to both citizens and tourists, whilst never compromising its visual beauty without maintaining its running effectiveness. Sydney, Australia, was a huge influence to the Master because of its prominent incorporation of a ferry transportation system, linking the various islands and ports that compose the Greater Sydney Area, not to mention the breathtaking, spectacular, skyline. The country of New Zealand, one of the Master's home nations, possesses the beauty of mountains, undeveloped land plagued by grass and sheep, the quiet and tranquil loneliness of the Sounds, and the pure happiness of unrequited freedom. Phuket, a small tourist-dominated location in Thailand, possesses a thrilling and electrifying night-life, its beaches lined with real seafood restaurants, countless pubs, altogether proving a simple-yet-effective medium of relaxation: the Master transferred this as well.

     New York, New York, host of the "Late Night with David Letterman" show, provides an energy and atmosphere unparalleled elsewhere in the world, a centre of entertainment superstars and interesting characters, resulting in the Master's reproduction of its ambience in downtown Muttford. He also recruited David Letterman and his WorldWide Pants corporation, relocating them entirely to a permanent home on the centre island of Muttford. Additional cities, in reference to personal experiences, provided the Master with impressions of scenic beauty and/or a prominent, breathtaking skyline, explicitly Toronto, Singapore, Sydney, Geneva, London, Paris, Hong Kong, Tokyo, Los Angeles, San Francisco, Christchurch, and Honolulu. Further visited cities playing a key role concerning domiciles, residences, and the semblance of a sense of community, were Melbourne, Sydney, Burlington (Ontario), and Honolulu, though especially the two Australian cities, as their various communities are situated separately, yet accessibly, with a premium emphasised on comfort and freedom.

     The Master's inventory of international experiences truly bestow the luxury of creativity in his vision to portray his personal ideals, within a city erected and fabricated solely by him.

Wordolg and Professional Sports

     The Wordolg Organisation, originally designed to promote professional sporting events within leagues amongst dogs, is now also the international assembly of canines, concerned with providing sufficient and positive socialisation for all of its species. Formed in 1983 out of the initiation of a baseball league, with multiple expansion it became a formidable, powerful organisation. Today, its major bases are operated out of twenty-four official North American cities, a dozen international cities, supported by approximately one-hundred cities worldwide.

     In 1983, with the sport of baseball as a source of professional organised extroverted canine activity, the cities of Wolverton and New Orleans cited the concept of a North American baseball league system, and recruited two additional cities, Louisville and Seattle, to accompany them in the inaugural season. The association was to be named Worldog, with the intention that it would eventually expand internationally, but when the official documents were printed, a typographical error spelled the name as Wordolg, and has not been reverted since. The first pitch of the first of many seasons to come came February 6, 1984, when Wolverton visited New Orleans.

     The first series of expansion occurred in 1988, when the cities of New York and Las Vegas were accepted into the organisation. Two years later, in 1990, the smallish Jacksonville (Florida) and San Antonio were admitted. In 1992, Muttford was finally granted entry, with Peoria (Illinois), Colorado, and Charlotte. Four more cities were inducted in 1994, San Francisco, Tampa Bay, Nebraska City, and St. Louis. The following year of 1995 gave immediate admission to Atlanta, Los Angeles, Boston, and Dyersburg (Tennessee), whilst announcing that Minneapolis, Houston, Pittsburgh, and Detroit would be accepted for 1996. Future cities are not primarily discussed anymore, as twenty-four by the end of the century appears adequate and satisfactory to the leaders of Wordolg. The pride of each of the cities is in its sports teams, all governed under the Wordolg rule, each with its minor league systems, scouting associations and inner-city development corporations, in their major goal of being the greatest city of animal (not merely canine) talent in the world.

     Nationalities are determined either by species origin, birth or parents' birthplace, and are rarely relevant to current residency. There are many countries recognised where its animals are governed internationally by Wordolg or involved in its running, and that forms the sporting rivalries between nations. Rugby, is the highest ranked international sport behind baseball, as it comprises of tenacious and high-paced fury with tactical territory control, and brings out sheer patriotism in every Wordolg country. The Wordolg Annual International Rugby Championship Tournament is played every August, the host site rotating amongst the eight major international Wordolg centres, in Wolverton, Muttford, Dyersburg, Toronto, Auckland, Sydney, Melbourne, and London. Washington, the major city base regarding Wordolg-American relations, is not included because it is yet to be recognised by the organisation, though it will likely be by the year 2002. The top international sporting country is not, surprisingly, the United States of America, but New Zealand, who, aside from rugby, also possesses some of the strongest baseball talent. Australia would be the second most dominant country, followed by America, Canada, Germany, Great Britain, South Africa, Muttford (whose greatest athletes are not eligible, because they are of other nationalities), and France with the remainder of countries heavily distanced. Individuals with mixed nationalities have the freedom to choose, but are warned that regularly shifting between countries may become hazardous to personal relations. There is also a Wordolg International team, where the elite canine athletes in the world compete against humans and other species in an array of sports... and often dominate them all.

     The commissioner of Wordolg, and thus its leader, is a youngish individual named Arhrold. Based in his hometown of Boulder City, Colorado, he governs over every aspect of the Wordolg machine, ranging from all sports and all international relations. Although he stands as the leader of Wordolg, he, staggeringly, does not carry the majority of influence or power in the organisation. The most formidable parties in the organisation are a trio of titans who, not just founded it, but additionally maintained it throughout the years. Astra, of Wolverton, is regarded as the highest force in Wordolg, though his rapid descent into old-age is publicly evident. McWorthy, of New Orleans, is fairly younger, and carries the hope of further ambition, without destroying the morals that constructed the current product in the beginning. Orre, of Nevada, very wise and very determined, contains a mystical, enchanting presence, and is considered to be the ensuing leader of Wordolg, if Arhrold should ever relinquish his status. The simple role of Arhrold in Wordolg is specifically to keep everything complete and royal, and to take the initiative of maintaining the organisation's effectiveness. He is also the only individual with power who does not personally manage a sports team, consequently, in his exceedingly increased spare time, he is able to perform his duties as commissioner, an excellent job at that.

     The operation of the Wordolg's intricate internal system is complex, concise, and highly effective. All global reports of incidents concerning canines, (and now, most animals), being either mistreated or becoming violent, would be circulated around the lower offices and reviewed by the appropriate authorities. In an overseas occurrence, all foreign offices would be notified, inquiries would be launched, and, if necessary, a task unit would be deployed to solve the problem. In the event that a canine has been badly treated, beaten, starved, kidnapped, raped or killed, the task force would confront the suspect, arrest the suspect, and transfer the suspect to one of the Wordolg Supreme Courts, dependant upon the home location of the victim. International human courts rarely interfere anymore with Wordolg trials or sentences, which are almost infallible, as well as being extraordinarily harsh.

     Vice versa, in the instance where a canine has actually committed an offence, the same procedures are in effect, but the victims are immediately compensated, even if the initial suspect was not guilty. Once the guilty party has been arraigned, however, an equally harsh process of court would be endured, but the sentence passed down would rely heavily on the situation. Acts of violence upon dogs by humans are very heavily punished, whereas vice versa, the humans most likely deserved it. All species are "put down" for murder, regardless of world domination, because murder is murder by anybody, and anybody who commits murder has no right to live.

The Guards of Muttford

     With such great savours and visions for a perfect city, the Master underlined the point that national security is to always be of the utmost potency. The Master had already resolved the issue of immigration and residence, but then needed a vehicle to completely protect the city's citizens and enforce its laws.

     To prohibit immigration and other unwanted entry, the bordering frontier of Muttford is composed of a barrier of forests and lakes, thus allotting only one official ground entrance into the mainland. This portal into Muttford, located south-east of the airport, serves as an extended customs depot, but does not protrude from the ground. Achieving this are the sunken tunnels that lead through an underground department of customs divisions: Visitors and Tourists, Immigration, Business, and Emergency Refuge. Visitors and tourists are usually dealt with quickly: they simply receive their personalised identification labels, affix them to their bodies and vehicles, are provided with a copy of Muttford laws and prohibitions, are scanned for firearms and illegal substances, and are on their way.

     Immigration inquiries are not tolerated as justly. It is internationally recognised that Muttford does not permit illegal immigration to any extent; in effect, violators are prosecuted and exported. Filing for legal immigration is an absolute process of application, as each candidate is thoroughly screened and examined before initial consideration. The Master ultimately decides upon the acceptance of the applicants, though will grant residence only if it is available, cutting out overpopulation. This procedure of bowdlerising maintains a society without a lower class, of high morals and values, and is exceptionally successful.

     Entrants to Muttford on business present officials with their information and identification forms, and are promptly escorted via company transportation to accommodation. The criterion for business stays allows up to a week of stop over, with authorisation for unlimited travel throughout the central island and its perimeters.

     Emergency Refuge is provided as an immediate escape for individuals or groups in fear of safety or their lives. Each entity in trouble may seek asylum at the office, are given the opportunity to detail their account, and would be provided with the most helpful information and alternatives available. Only under very rare circumstances are these individuals granted residence, and the majority of cases result in a temporary, guarded ward. The Muttford Affairs department handle all forms of disgruntled individual's matters, by form of colloquies with all parties involved. Resolutions are regularly achievable. It should also be noted that the airport and seaport custom departments encompass identical offices, and follow the same guidelines for admittance.

     The personalised identification tags are made of laser-readable card, contain all relevant assimilation, and provide the location of every individual at all times. Each tag is monitored to know where everybody is, and whether they are permitted to be there. The explanation for this scrutinising and privacy-invading system is justified: solving a crime from this information is almost fail-proof, and a close eye can be kept on suspected infiltrators. For example, there are many who are not authorised to enter the central island, for a variety of reasons. An non-permitted venture onto the central island would result in a red alert, followed by a massive chase from helicopters, armoured vehicles and motorcycles. An intruder's reason for breaking this law is rarely one of violent anarchy and criminal intent, but occasionally a crime is purposed, and the city can never be too careful. Entering the city without a tag entirely is another offence, because each vehicle must have one regardless, and public transportation to the island is impossible without a personal tag. Nobody here questions these procedures.

     The security and defence batteries in Muttford comprise of emergency services (police, ambulance, fire and psychology), the Silent Secret Service (or, the "Invisible Frontier"), the border-protecting army and navy, the MCS associates, and the guards of the Master; all working co-efficiently and productively together. Emergency services provide the basic utilities of law enforcement and crisis assistance, and each emergency zone is close and highly accessible to every community. Help is always available at every zero hour to anybody.

     The Secret Silent Service, referred to as the Invisible Frontier, is a quiet and unobtrusive medium that deals with the general safety of all citizens, the external monitoring of national security, and serves as the city's nightwatch unit. Its personnel are unknown to the general public, and are among the most intellectual and strategic minds in the world. Patrolling the streets of Muttford in common clothing, the Frontier ensures public assurance and peace. When a problem arises, the Frontier calmly and collectively deals with it effectively, without public awareness or concern. Subsequently, in command of national security, voluminous quantities of scenarios are blue-printed in the wee possibility of an invasion. At night, the Frontier is at full strength, watching the water and the sky for any unlikely, harmful intruder. Their base lies quietly between Dyers Park and the Wordolg Centre; unreachable by the average citizen, the quiet buildings hardly distracting from the city's landscape, even though their function is of great importance.

     MCS, the Muttford Communication Services, provide additional security and protection, but only to its associates. Another dimension of this sub-organisation is that it frequently uses force and physical assault, and still surprisingly accepted by the government. If an associate is bullied, threatened, or harassed, several MCS security associates will investigate the matter, confront the violator, upon whom the appropriate punishment will be served, either by beating or extermination. Death, though, is not acceptable, and penalties are administered.

     The Muttford army and navy guard the borders of the city, and are employed to prevent illegal attempts of entering Muttford and to create a solid wall of defence if under attack. The navy, honourably nicknamed the Seadogs, skim across the waters of the Pacific Ocean and the Muttford Sea, searching for conspired undertakings from the water to gain illegal access. The shores are also patrolled, as the drowning death of Fred many years ago has prompted full water activity monitoring.

     The purpose of the Master's guards is not, mysteriously, to protect and defend the Master, but to solve every remaining problem after the other forces are unable to themselves. Used primarily as a back-up scheme, it leaves no incident untouched and unresolved.

     The abundance of security tiers may seem unnecessary and dominating, but the purpose it serves is important whilst wisely operating without public distraction. The laws of Muttford and their ensuing punishments are equally intense. Even the safest cities in the world will all occasionally experience crime, and Muttford is no exception.

     The Muttford Constitution, inscribed by the Master on June 23rd, 1977, follow the theme of international compositions, but place accurate and honest restrictions and explanations on their civil freedoms. The chapter concerning rights and allowances under the constitution states the following conditional liberties for all citizens of Muttford:

     The Freedom of Speech, is a guarantee of uncensored communication from an individual, acknowledged in most countries but not literally tolerated. There is truthfully no real freedom to speak exactly as one chooses, as morals in society prevent anyone from making expletive, vulgar, discriminatory and hateful comments, even if entirely accurate and personal. A true Freedom of Speech would allow unconditional swearing, racist, sexist and homophobic comments, limitless threats of life and harm, and everything else possible in vocabulary, which is absolutely unacceptable. The Master of Muttford thus altered this amendment to stand as The Freedom of Rightful Speech. This gives each individual the right to speak as one chooses, so long as one is considerate, thoughtful, unprejudiced and not rude, at very least in public. Each young, new Muttfordian baby should be instilled with these values and morals at birth and whilst raised, so that they become productive members of society in their adult years, and enforced so that this positively and politeness become habits. Nobody here questions this.

     The Freedom of the Press, suggests that any form of written content or expression is acceptable, yet people internationally protest whenever any controversial subject is publicly printed. Again, the literal outline for this amendment is contradictory. True freedom of the written word would again include statements of hate, prejudice, harassment and conspiracy, none of which are acceptable. Publications based on sensationalism (tabloids and other false news) are considered to be a negative influence on readers and society. The City of Muttford has thus imposed publication bans on the local sales of all tabloid newspapers and/or magazines, and restricted all speculative or hearsay-based tabloid television programs, although it is legal to purchase such material outside the borders of Muttford, and import them only for absolute private use. The Master cites this liberty to stand as The Freedom of Rightful and Accurate Press, hence implying that all public written accounts are to be doubtlessly factual and without threatening, obsessively vulgar, or prejudiced content. This ensures that all news reported is almost certainly exact, and that bad written influences are abolished. Nobody here questions this; in fact, most citizens welcome this positive censorship.

     The Freedom of Assembly, seemingly gives groups the right to gather for any reason without enforcement or legal confrontation. Almost everybody assembles in friendship or business-oriented groups, but, in regards to opposition, protests and rallies are prominent universally, usually in demonstration over controversial or political issues. This right appears to allow anybody to gather anywhere about anything at anytime, but often, local authorities are summoned and/or counter-demonstrations commence in response. Most subjects are usually protested in negative, and sometimes destructive, faith. Strikes by workers (more often as part of unions) are equally wrecking to society and to the safety and ease of most citizens. The Master has altered the liberty of grouping to read as The Freedom of Casual Assembly. This prohibits the gathering of protesters, forbids the process of strikes (as well as eliminating any possible workers' unions), but provides that any individual or group of individuals has the right to make an appointment with a city official to discuss the matter/s at hand. Nobody here questions this, nor finds any issues to forcibly oppose.

     The Freedom of Thought remains The Freedom of Thought as nobody can really control anybody's thoughts. Good morals and values, if instilled whilst raising youths during puppyhood, become the greatest source of having individuals thinking positively, politely and productively. Nobody knows if anyone here questions this, because nobody knows what anybody really thinks or believes.

     Muttford is ranked internationally with Singapore as having the first and second highest (respectively) tough-but-just legal systems and ensuing penalties in the world. The difference between the two city-nations is that all Muttford judges are given full authority to judge and sentence each defendant, whilst Singapore (and most other legal systems) maintains a jury method.

     Judges are the highest ranked individuals in Muttford below the small political ladder, and consist of the most intelligent, unbiased, unperturbed, and best deducers of character on the planet. The leader of Law and Order in Muttford is a splendid young black being named Dabroy. It is he who sets the standard for other judges in Muttford, and it is he who always exceeds it. The lone magistrate of the Supreme Court of Muttford, he deals only with the most heinous of crimes, usually murder, rape (of all forms), and drug trafficking.

     Murder is the one intolerable crime that the city does not treat lightly in any way, even in the accidental variety. The first count of murder usually carries a twenty-year minimum rehabilitation prison sentence at the Isle of Punition. Multiple murder, or a second charge for major crime, is punishable only by execution. Violent and destructive offenders are given only one chance, and pleads of insanity or "under-the-influence of illicit substances" are not acceptable. The taking of anyone's life is the worst offence that any individual could possibly commit, and punishment should definitely fit the crime. Also, even the worst criminals within Muttford hold the decency, honour and valour to admit when they have committed an offence and been caught, so a false plea of "not guilty" is rarely heard as a response from most defendants.

     Execution is usually by means of lethal injection, the popular term of which is being "put down to sleep", the method most incorrigible animals worldwide are sentenced to. Alternative channels of liquidation include electrocution, suffocation, and (very uncommon) by firing squad, all dependant on the individual and the degree of offence committed. For example, the former is administered before a small audience of delegates, for the offences of torturous murder, prolonged torturous rape (of any kind), and extreme violence or drug use whilst in guarded captivity. Suffocation is usually utilised with drug related crimes (such as smuggling or use), and with murder and rape if the offender commits the crimes by form of suffocation. The latter, the use of the Muttford Army Firing Squad, is used for official diplomatic or political-oriented crimes, if the crime is focused against the government as part of anarchy or if assassinations were conspired and/or committed. A majority of the time, the punishment is served to fit the content of the crime: if the offender had electrocuted its victim, the offender can quite expect to be locked onto an iron throne and electrocuted themself. There are no exceptions or estranged bias towards the sentencing of criminals, as all judges are focused in the city's policies and standards, certainly maintaining that no crime goes without fair penalty.

     Rape is prevalent in more forms than sexual domination: rape widely translates as the violation and forced-jurisdiction by any individual over another unconsenting being. Sexual rape, raping of the mind and beliefs, raping of the spirit, raping of the soul, raping of freedom, and raping of privacy are among the prime examples of dominance and violation. The scars that an individual has to live through and resolve are too substantial to ever forget. The Supreme Court of Muttford has thus resolved that any means or form or forced violation is to be regarded almost as seriously as murder; ironically, victims of murder do not live through eternal suffering as victims of rape do, perhaps confusing which crime is more serious.

     Narcotics are dealt with similar again to Singapore: at a zero tolerance policy. All individuals involved in the conspiracy and act of drug smuggling into Muttford will be punished by death, regardless of quantity or substance. This means, under international law, that individuals or groups implicated in the drug border-crossing based outside of Muttford may be summoned to a Muttford court and sentenced there.

     Substance abuse is more easily controlled: first offenders are referred to drug clinics and counselling, where their addiction is most likely to be solved. Any subsequent offences (up to two) are punishable by relatively long sentences at the Isle of Punition. The fourth arrest for the individual, of any major or minor kind, generally results in a life sentence in solitude, or sometimes even death. Drugs only corrupt society and its youth, pose disastrous health hazards, and aren't really necessary at all in Muttford (if anywhere) because of the limitless opportunities for success and the freedom to do anything one wants to.

     Admittedly, Muttford officials realise that total abolishment of the presence of drugs is practically impossible, but the laws ensure that the penalties for violating the various drug laws prove either too disparaging, or that the death penalties imposed lessen the number of individuals involved in the trade.

     Any convicted felon, regardless whether they are of Muttford or international residency, have the overwhelming probability that they will be blacklisted from ever entering or re-entering Muttford. The Customs/Immigration Office, always monitoring local court trials and investigating into the histories of its entrants, compile a list of individuals and organisations who are not permitted under law to cross the borders of Muttford. This list, under the term of blacklisting, is forwarded to officials at the MCS, DHI, the Silent Secret Services and the Guards of the Master, so that all agencies are aware and informed at all times. All the separate organisations have the ability to blacklist an individual, though confirmation of each extrication is not attainable until a small case is presented before a Supreme Court justice.

     This process removes the majority of negative and destructive creatures living in Muttford, and eliminates the ingression of the similar from other soils into the city. This again brings inner-peace, safety and ease to the citizens of Muttford, because they don't have to worry about detrimental beings, and they realise that essentially just about everybody in Muttford is decent.

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